February 2009 Prompt #6

My workshop with Kelly Kilmer is tomorrow. Despite all evidence to the contrary, I'm not always the cheeky, confident wench you might envision (if that's what you envision!). Presently, I'm two things: a) rabid with excitement, which I told Kelly as a warning (ha!) and b) agonized with self-doubt. I never feel like I 'do well' at this kind of thing -- not the art part, but rather the grooving with a room full of women part. Like somehow I'm not a whole enough woman. Long story. Anyway, the prompt for today's journaling was to write a letter to myself, past, present, future [whatever I wanted] -- so I wrote to myself, tonight, about tomorrow. It's hard to read (my white paint pen is failing!), so here is the text. "My Precious Sirena [my soul name for myself] -- Remember your word for this journal is this: BELONG. Embrace this opportunity to use it as a verb and not just a word on paper. Be yourself -- this is the ancient advice and the truest practice. DO NOT WITHDRAW. Leave fear and inadequacy at the door. At home. Try something new -- the bliss of making art in the comfort and company of others. You've been longing for this -- an artistic collective. Beautiful woman, you DO belong -- I know it, and I wanted to let you hear from me before you go tomorrow."