Friday, February 6, 2009

February 2009 Prompt #6

My workshop with Kelly Kilmer is tomorrow. Despite all evidence to the contrary, I'm not always the cheeky, confident wench you might envision (if that's what you envision!). Presently, I'm two things: a) rabid with excitement, which I told Kelly as a warning (ha!) and b) agonized with self-doubt. I never feel like I 'do well' at this kind of thing -- not the art part, but rather the grooving with a room full of women part. Like somehow I'm not a whole enough woman. Long story. Anyway, the prompt for today's journaling was to write a letter to myself, past, present, future [whatever I wanted] -- so I wrote to myself, tonight, about tomorrow. It's hard to read (my white paint pen is failing!), so here is the text. "My Precious Sirena [my soul name for myself] -- Remember your word for this journal is this: BELONG. Embrace this opportunity to use it as a verb and not just a word on paper. Be yourself -- this is the ancient advice and the truest practice. DO NOT WITHDRAW. Leave fear and inadequacy at the door. At home. Try something new -- the bliss of making art in the comfort and company of others. You've been longing for this -- an artistic collective. Beautiful woman, you DO belong -- I know it, and I wanted to let you hear from me before you go tomorrow."

10 comments:

R2K said...

: )

LostLuggage said...

I think that it is perfectly normal to feel like this on your first class "eve"...I know I did. You're goin gto have a great time- just be yourself and let the creativity flow :)

Hans said...

Sirena (Toni) let your spirit sore and let your fingers dance like the flames of a camfire over your art so that they may take you wherever they were meant to go. You are going to have the most wonderful day of your life and you will enjoy every moment of it :)

Hans on Vancouver Island, BC, Canada

Mimi said...

That is a great letter. If only we could all take our own advice! :D oh, and gratz on being a blog of note!

Toni said...

Hans - I don't know if you'll ever be back to read this, but your comment made me cry. I woke up this morning (the day of my workshop) feeling so anxious, and there was your comment, and then those above it, and suddenly everything about my perspective shifted, my heart lightened! THANK YOU!

beth said...

I always feel that way before a class too...but based on what you've been working on lately...you are going to ROCK that class and you will be loved by all, just by walking into the room with your huge heart and extremely funny self !!!

Rambling Rose said...

What a great journaling exercise. Thanks for the inspiration.

Debbieorah said...

Those classes are great. They can be daunting at the beginning but ope up to many wonderful things. You will walk away from this changed..even if only for a few hours.

I'm so glad I stumbled upon your blog. I wish mine was half as interesting!!!

Deb

whisper said...

nice

rivergardenstudio said...

What a simply gorgeous piece, your art is evolving so beautifully, and I love seeing it. Your class sounds like it was amazing... lucky you!!!