What I Did on my 2nd Blog Anniversary

I awoke to rain rain rain ... sweet good morning. This inspired me to take my Daddy-O Cam to work with me and take puddle pictures.

At home, after work, my youngest male child enlisted MOM to help him make tacos -- meaning he wanted to go buy the fixins and have ME do it, but I wasn't in enabler mode ... I stood close and gave instructions in my best Julia Child voice, and also took photos of him chopping onion, greasing the shell pan, stirring in the taco sauce ...

after, he and I sat to do some on-line work related to his financial aid (first class is the 19th) ...

and then we received ....

WAIT FOR IT ...

THE FATAL BLUE SCREEN ERROR!!!

and the laptop happily shut itself down, with an 'in your face' whistle.

My male child and I looked at each other, eyebrows knit together, both of us clearly thinking our individual versions of WTF?

So I booted it back up AND had a message waiting for me: SYSTEM HAS EXPERIENCED A FATAL DISC ERROR. And the damn thing blue-screened and shut down again.

I have not paid the IT guy fully, yet, for the last go-round to repair the sucker. Best Buy can replace the hard drive but you know? I've already paid MORE to try to fix the thang than I originally paid to purchase it. Given our current home repair and Two Sons In College situation, and the fact that I got no raise for going into my 3rd year ... I'm not feeling a laptop replacement as a priority. At all.
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What that means, though, is that my blog anniversary was also my blog farewell. I have, in the past, managed the occasional covert blog post from work, but relying on posting from the office is a truly BAD idea, completely unrealistic. Anyway, I can't download the driver for my Daddy-O Cam or any other software without alerting my boss, who is adamantly opposed to anything extraneous (or personal) by way of programs on the company server.

Truth is, for the last year I've been straddling the fence on whether to continue blogging or not. I love it, yet I resent it (time suckage). I've become more and more BORED with myself -- i.e. posting journal backgrounds ... and I've wanted more time to read, to hang with my boys and watch movies, to get OUT of the studio more, to start walking and weight training with my Double BB, to approach a personal creative writing project I've been piecing together in a goal book/dedicated journal for over a decade.

I've been talking to the Universe for 3 months about all this, unable to reach a decision. When in England, I was LOVING not having any laptop, no email, no blog posting at all, no reason whatsoever to be on 'Laptop Lockdown' ... just to realize I had been referring to it that way ... pretty indicative. So ... I'm taking this as the Universe's answer to my querying and pleading and ranting and agonizing and vacillating. A dead laptop and financial lockdown are a pretty non-negotiable lockdown of their own.

Those of you lovely people out there who want to stay in touch ... even though I'm on Facebook, I hate that venue so don't visit much at all. Emailing me is still the most direct way to contact me. Feel free to do so! antoniafufu@yahoo.com

Lights out. True story. Love to all.